


Dirty Pockets

by Ayb_Abtu



Category: Zootopia (2016)
Genre: Explicit Language, F/M, Morning After, Out of Character, Sexual Humor, Short One Shot, Sweet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-09
Updated: 2017-05-14
Packaged: 2018-09-16 00:30:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9265802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ayb_Abtu/pseuds/Ayb_Abtu
Summary: Any stories I put here are completely unconnected to the universe(s) of my other stories, but I couldn't go on forever without making some sex jokes, or adult humor... I'll add more if/when they come to me. (If my archive rating/tags are wrong let me know)





	1. Like Glue

         Judy stirred beneath the covers as she slowly woke up, "Ugh" she muttered, "ahh... OW!" as she was struck by sharp pains from her legs at each move she made.

"NIIIIICCK!!" Judy screamed from the bedroom. Nicks ears perked in the other room, before he appeared in the doorway.

"Well, look who's finally up..." he said snarkily, through a smug smile.

"Shut up and help me to the shower!" she yelled.

"Huh? Its... right there..." he replied, still smiling wide, pointing to the doorway only feet away from her side of the bed, "You can't manage?"

"NO! The fur on my thighs is glued together from your DRIED FUCK SLUDGE!" she shouted, scowling at him. Nick laughed and folded his arms, leaning against the doorjamb. "It's almost all the way down to my knees... What the hell did you do?!" her lip raising slowly in disgust.

"It's not my fault Fluff. You're the one who didn't get up and shower afterwards." he teased as she struggled to inch her way to the edge of the bed without ripping any hairs out.

"I didn't DECIDE to lose consciousness during my fourth..." she trailed off, "...so I'd say its yours!" 

"Well maybe YOU shouldn't have been giving me such a... motivational speech..." he said raising an eyebrow curiously, "besides, this sounds like a free show, watching you waddle to the door, sooo..."

"Don't you dare say it..." she interrupted, her eyes blazing at him.

"...Cute..." he finished, calling her challenge, "What are you gonna do? Chase me?" he instigated further.

"Ass" she exclaimed with a sigh, managing to get her conjoined legs over the side of the bed.

"Well I guess that would make you a 'piece of me' wouldn't it?" he said, pushing himself away from the door, before slowly walking over to her turned back.

"I'd better be a LOT more than that, Fox..." she spat at his words, her hands gripping the side of the bed. Nick stepped past her and started the water in the shower. Once it was on, he turned back to her, reaching out an arm through the doorway. She looked up and couldn't help but smile after seeing his grin. She threw her arm up at him, but he stepped in closer to wrap his arm under hers, around to her other shoulder, and his other arm under her knees.

"Of course you are dear." he said, rubbing his nose against hers, forcing a laugh from her. As he carried her into the bathroom, he paused to leave their rings on the counter of the sink, and kick the door closed behind them.


	2. Bothered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apparently, rabbits can't throw up... as Nick has recently discovered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just another quick dirty joke scene... less dirty than the first but, still...

"Why would it bother me?" Judy asked, climbing into the booth seat.

"Not sure, I just expected an earful" Nick replied with a chuckle, as he pushed the empty plate to the end of the table.

"Well, you ARE suppose to be checking meters everywhere, not just the ones on my block." Judy teased. "But it did make it easy for me to join you for lunch."

"Almost... I already finished, and there's only ten minutes left on my break." Nick responded with a shrug.

"You should have messaged me sooner." Judy said.

"Wasn't sure if you'd even be awake," Nick started, "it's not often you have a day off and I don't."

"I couldn't get back to sleep." She admitted, "Not sure why." she added, looking away from him coyly as she thought about the previous night, creating a pleasant quake that made the muscles in her legs twitch.

"Anyway," Nick started changing the subject, "I picked up an interesting tidbit about rabbits this morning..." Judy raised an eyebrow suspiciously.

"More web searches...?" she said, unimpressed. Nick smiled with a nod.

"It seems, rabbits can't throw up?" he asked. She pulled back, surprised by the question.

"...yeah... so?" she admitted, her defensive tone was exactly what he expected.

"So... I'm willing to bet, you don't have a gag reflex either..." he accused, his grin turning devilish.

"Maybe we should test that?" she replied in a sultry tone, the boldness her answer rendering his prepared response useless. 

"I usually think of rabbits, especially you, as being modest... even fairly innocent, but that," Nick said, feigning disgust, "was FILTHY!"

"Shhh..." Judy said putting a finger over her mouth, hushing a giggle, "...closely guarded bunny secret..." Nick pursed his lips, nodding lightly.

"So, I guess I walked into a world or secrets and lies then?" he joked.

"OOoo, so deep." Judy added with a laugh. Nick pulled his head back, washing with confusion.

"Did I... already tell you the fox secret?" he asked, his tone further displaying his confusion. Judy tilted her head slightly, staring at him, waiting for an explanation. Nick leaned over the table, holding the tip of his snout between her ears.

"We get... DEEP!" he whispered. Judy's ears twitched, as a shiver ran from where his breath struck her ears, all the way down her spine. Her eyes flung wide open at the sensation, savoring it. Once it finally passed, Nick leaned back, relishing in her expression, boasting a proud smile after seeing her jaw hanging open, one of her ears still twitching.

"You... shouldn't talk like that..." Judy replied, trying to focus.

"And, why is that?" Nick answered through a smug smile.

"You don't have time to put your money where your mouth is..." she argued, doing her best to  ward her own thoughts away, as she grabbed his tie. Nick leaned toward her again, looking her in the eye.

"Unh unh..." he muttered, his tone still low, shaking his head slowly, "... the only thing going near my mouth, is YOUR money..."

"Huh!" Judy blurted, gently panting, as her thoughts escaped their makeshift corral, sending another shudder through her. "CHECK!" she shouted across the diner. Nick glared at her, his cocky smile refusing to fade, as her grip tightened around the tie. The small plastic tray hit the table, she reached into her pocket, slapping the cash onto it, without looking away from Nick, and forcefully pulled him from the booth, the diner, and his job, finding better work for both of them.


End file.
